Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Here we go... This is the beginning, the most valuable and vulnerable part of a project, of life itself.
Rookies' Heaven and creators' Hell, the soft spot for the nightmare of writer's block to creep in.
My first actual post.

Whether it's a fresh start or a restart, one should begin with fundamentals and look at the big picture, in order to build a solid base.
When it comes to a personal journey (which this blog actually is), what could be more fundamental than the very self, the way one sees their self, co-exists and interacts with it.

This is an older piece of work, from back when I was still at war with my self. I would attack and there would always be a counterattack, in a seemingly never ending battle. There were also times of peace - brief ones, though. Still, it was better than the phase before that, when I was only battering my self, like a monster attacking a helpless child that, unable to defend itself, was just taking the blows.
Currently, me, my self and I, after changes, setbacks and some skin shedding, have reached the phase of diplomacy and negotiations. (One -extremely- small step for mankind, one giant leap for me).


(I just read the last paragraph I wrote... It makes me seem totally bipolar, doesn't it? ...Nah, I'll just ignore that and let the paragraph be as it is. Feel free to think whatever you like!)


Just my self reflection

Mirror mirror on the wall,
who's the greatest one of foes?

Who is the one I most resent,
yet loving them I am condemned

I ask again, although I know
that silence will still linger
like the scent of a stranger I once knew
because no answer lies in words
It's just my self reflection


These few lines go hand in hand with another short monologue-like poem, naturally, like siblings.
Naturally, as self-hatred and doubt bring along their best friends to the party, depression and apathy.
And they keep drugging you, to the point where simple feelings, joys and tears of everyday life, can't be felt, sun rays can no longer reach you and you prefer getting lost in sleep's oblivion.
To live only by night, seeking to sense and feel alive, overtaken only by rushes and violent desires, or endlessly contemplating your emptiness in seclusion. 


Nocturne Path

Give me a hug, or give me a gun,

trigger my emotions or my hand

scar my soul and make it bleed

show me your intention's deep

or don't bother, let me hanging

gazing my imaginary friend in outer space.

It will be forever and a day

before my fate takes its rightful place.

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